?? "Not So Fresh" ??
(A sassy, punk-pop anthem about shady hygiene products!)
[Verse 1]
Saw it online, all pink and cute,
"Organic! Pure!" – yeah, what a joke!
Influencers said, "It's safe, it's best!"
Now my skin’s a red-hot mess!
[Pre-Chorus]
Ooh-la-la, what’s that spot?
Tiny bugs in my private spot!
"Hypoallergenic?" That’s a scam,
Now I’m itching like a broken RAM!
[Chorus]
Not so fresh, not so clean,
What’s hiding in that cotton dream?
Five-star reviews? All fake news!
*Now I’m singing the "WTF" blues!
[Verse 2]
Paid extra cash for "herbal grace,"
Got a rash in its place!
CEO’s like, "Trust the brand!"
While my lawyer’s drafting plans!
[Pre-Chorus]
Ooh-la-la, FDA,
Why you letting them play?
"Lady problems?" Nah—this crime,
Time to jail that profit line!
[Chorus]
Not so fresh, not so clean,
What’s hiding in that cotton dream?
Five-star reviews? All fake news!
*Now I’m singing the "WTF" blues!
[Bridge] (Chant Style)
Hey! Ho! These pads must go!
Take your toxins, take your bugs,
Give us back our trust (and cash)!
[Outro] (Whispered sarcasm)
"But hey, at least the packaging’s pretty…"
(Mic drop, riotous grunge guitar smash!)
?? Vibe: Imagine Avril Lavigne meets Bikini Kill—angsty, darkly funny, and fiercely feminist. Perfect for protest playlists or a cathartic shower scream-sing! ????
P.S. Bonus points if performed with a giant inflatable tainted pad prop on stage. ??